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Author Topic: I'll be less present around here for a while...  (Read 3919 times)
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TerraEsperZ
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« on: May 04, 2006, 10:10:54 AM »

Long story short, I'm addicted to my computer; addicted to surfing, addicted to message boards, etc. For the last few years, I've probably spent about 80% of all my free time on my computer.



Well yesterday evening, I don't why exactly but all of a sudden I just got sick to death of my computer. I *had* to turn it off, as if it was some huge bug crawling over my body that I needed to slap off and crush with my foot. It was probably the first time in I don't know how long that my computer at home wasn't open from the moment I come back from work to when I'm ready to go to sleep.



The sudden silence was almost bliss. It also made me realize that spending all my time on the computer is why I have no social life at all. I already knew it, but I guess I didn't really *accept* it. I wish I had that realization long ago.



So from now on (hopefully), I'll limit time on my computer at home to a few hours *maximum*, and even then, that might be too much, what with a possible relapse and all.



I'll still come here in my free time at work, but I won't be active much in the evening, and mapping is definitely taking a break for a while. I'm pretty sure that mapping Metroid Fusion intensely for several weeks only hastened the crisis.



Sorry guys. I won't be gone completely, but I really need to take a serious break for a while.



---

"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censored, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." [...] The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged. - Captain Jean-Luc Picard



B*tch, meet reality. Reality, meet b*tch. - Me
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Current project that I really should try to finish:
-Drill Dozer (GBA)
-Sonic 3D Blast (Genesis)
-Naya's Quest (PC)
-Lilly Looking Through (PC)

Pending project:
-A ton of stuff that will never be finished
Thraxian
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« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2006, 12:32:15 PM »

Terra, you will be missed.  I hope you find what you are looking for.  If not, know you are always welcome here.



As for "no social life at all"...what is being social all about, except conversing and spending time with people with similar interests...



I fully understand your desire to interact with people in a more physical flesh-and-blood kind of way.  Interacting with only a computer monitor and a keyboard leaves one needing the warmth of a handshake, or the sound of a real laugh every now and again.  Plus, smoothies and milkshakes taste so much better when they're not pictures on a screen.  Am I right?
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TerraEsperZ
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« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2006, 12:41:34 PM »

Exactly right. Aside from my family and a friend or two who don't live in my city, I've been pretty much alone for the last two years. I've always been afraid of personal contact, of letting people inside my personal space, yet at the same time I need it, which makes for a nice contradiction. You know the way we humans are, we don't always make much sense.



Yesterday I just had like a divine realization that spending time on my computer has been pretty much a reflex when I'm home alone ever since I've lived alone, for two years like I said. I went from living with my best friend to having no real friend except one that I only get to see once every 2 or 3 weeks. Talking on the phone or chating no the web are nothing compared to spending time, doing anything, with someone in real life.



What I need is to try and create my own social circle, something I should have done years ago but just was too afraid to do (there's a reason I've been seeing as psychologist for the last few years; I have a lot of fear issues despite there being no real trauma being it all)



I'll keep visiting here during the day at least, but I'm afraid I won't be contributing much in actual maps for a while, not until I've learned to be reasonable in the time I spend online.



But make no mistake, I'm glad to have this place to talk with people Smiley



---

"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censored, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." [...] The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged. - Captain Jean-Luc Picard



B*tch, meet reality. Reality, meet b*tch. - Me
Logged

Current project that I really should try to finish:
-Drill Dozer (GBA)
-Sonic 3D Blast (Genesis)
-Naya's Quest (PC)
-Lilly Looking Through (PC)

Pending project:
-A ton of stuff that will never be finished
Thraxian
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« Reply #3 on: May 04, 2006, 12:58:29 PM »

Not to get all evangelical or nothing, but I've found a great place to get in touch with people is through church.  While the whole point of church is to spend time with God, you'll often find yourself spending time with other people also.  



My wife and I used to be the type of people who would sit around and do nothing all day but watch TV.  We started going to a new church and found a group of people in the same stage of life as us, and are now much more social people than we were before.



Humans are social creatures.  We don't just want interaction, but we need it.  Whether it is to go out drinking and dancing, or talking and praying, we all need a group to belong to.  I hope you find yours.



By the way...creating a social circle is more difficult than joining one, especially if you aren't really social to begin with.  Figure out what you like to do, and place yourself among others doing the same.  If you like walking or hiking, go to a trailhead or a park.  If you like basketball, hang out at a court and wait to join a pick-up game.  If you like dogs, go to a dog park, or take yours for a walk around the neighborhood.   Eventually, you'll cross paths with someone interesting, and maybe get an invite into one of their circles.
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TerraEsperZ
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« Reply #4 on: May 04, 2006, 06:53:57 PM »

Thanks for the tip, but church is right out for me, being agnostic and all.



As for the social circle thing, yeah I meant become part of one. I'm hoping to find some hobby or social activity that would let me meet people with whom I'd get along.



---

"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censored, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." [...] The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged. - Captain Jean-Luc Picard



B*tch, meet reality. Reality, meet b*tch. - Me
Logged

Current project that I really should try to finish:
-Drill Dozer (GBA)
-Sonic 3D Blast (Genesis)
-Naya's Quest (PC)
-Lilly Looking Through (PC)

Pending project:
-A ton of stuff that will never be finished
Revned
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« Reply #5 on: May 04, 2006, 07:27:03 PM »

Good luck, TerraEsperZ. I hope you can find happiness. I sure wish I could stop using the computer so much. I've been using it less lately, but not significantly.
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Inty
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« Reply #6 on: May 05, 2006, 03:59:44 AM »

Internet > Crack

---

My most recently played track

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<b>I need £5 paypal to pay subs ._.</b>
TerraEsperZ
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« Reply #7 on: May 05, 2006, 06:21:02 AM »

Inty Said:
Internet > Crack

---

My most recently played track


And a lot less costly too.



But anyway, it's not like I won't be posting here anymore, just not from home. Life goes on, and all that jazz...



*nothing better to date yourself than to use expressions you've heard somewhere once that are probably -years- out of style Cheesy *





---

"With the first link, the chain is forged. The first speech censored, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." [...] The first time any man's freedom is trodden on, we're all damaged. - Captain Jean-Luc Picard



B*tch, meet reality. Reality, meet b*tch. - Me
Logged

Current project that I really should try to finish:
-Drill Dozer (GBA)
-Sonic 3D Blast (Genesis)
-Naya's Quest (PC)
-Lilly Looking Through (PC)

Pending project:
-A ton of stuff that will never be finished
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